“Mother Me” by Zara Phillips
An Adopted Woman’s Journey to Motherhood
‘Mother Me’ is about Zara’s personal journey to motherhood from an adoptee’s point of view.
This is an intensely personal and compelling memoir in which Zara describes her feelings as an adopted person and explores her relationships with her adoptive and birthmothers, and invites the reader to join her in her own journey to becoming a Mother.
The adopted daughter of loving parents, Zara Phillips nonetheless felt out of place in her family and a misfit in the world around her.
Although cherished by a well-meaning mother and father, she grew up feeling deeply insecure and alone, consumed by a void she found impossible to fill. Isolation led to alienation, yet her talent brought her to the center of the thriving London rock ‘n’ roll scene of the 1980s. Her downward spiral fueled by its lifestyle, Zara became lost in drugs, alcohol and destructive relationships.
An intense search for the truth of her birth led to an awakening and successful recovery. Yet, it was her experience of becoming a mother that revealed what being an adopted person really meant to her. For the first time, she gained deep understanding and compassion for both her birth mother and her adoptive mother and was able to start the healing process.
“It seems that birthing my children was also a birth for my whole self.”
The tale of Zara’s search for her birth mother and her path to health is riveting, as are the stories of many people sharing her past. Zara’s activism for adoptee rights springs from a very personal passion. Mother Me is a brave and compelling memoir that illuminates the lifelong impact of adoption on every member of the “adoption triad”—adoptee, birth mother and adoptive mother—as well as the families of each.
‘Mother Me’ was published by BAAF (British Association for Adoption and Fostering) in the UK and was released on March 3rd 2008. ‘Mother Me’ was picked up by Gemma Media and an updated version was released on February 14th 2011 in the U.S.A.
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American Version
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UK Version
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“A much needed look at a subject ignored by most writers. I recommend it to everyone connected with adoption.” Continue reading
“Zara Phillips tell us what its like to be adopted as she rocks and howls from adopteehood to motherhood.”
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“This is a brave and compelling book. It’s also a probably much needed “how to” and “why to” step-by-step guide through the awful emotional turbulence of adoption. Zara was always talented and driven. Now I know why.” Continue reading
“Many adopted parents feel that if they just love their adopted baby enough it will heal all their wounds. Parents need to be aware of the full range of issues they will face in raising an adopted child so they can recognize and deal with the inherent feelings of rejection and abandonment that occur when a child is raised by someone other than their biological parents. Mother me is an honest portrayal of these and other issues.”
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“As an adoptee and mother of three ourselves, Zara H Phillips and her book Mother Me has touched parts that no other could even know existed. Hurrah for Zara H Phillips! She has compassionately expressed, with at times alarmingly forthright clarity so much that is hard to articulate about the adoption experience.” Continue reading
” No one else has covered the terrain that Zara Phillips’ memoir, MOTHER ME, explores; that is, how closed adoption affects adopted adults when we become parents. You’d never believe that adoption would an inter-generational condition but it turns out it is. Continue reading
“Society needs to recognise children who have been adopted, or who have been in and out of foster care, and acknowledge that they may experience grief and problems and sadness.” –Zara Phillips, in the introduction of her memoir, Mother Me
In Mother Me author Zara Phillips shares that she always knew she had been adopted. However, adoption was not discussed within her family. While Phillips was close to her mom and grandmother, her father kept her at a distance and she felt “out of place.” Continue reading
“As an adoptee that recently gave birth. I have been struck by how much adoption has re entered by psyche. Phillips explores this issue in Mother me with a rare and profound insight and contextualizes it around her own fascinating story. Its an important topic and high time that someone explored it.”
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“Mother Me captures all the feelings, thoughts and emotions of what all adoptees actually go through.” Continue reading
“Many adopting parents have no tools to understand the children they are adopting. This book is a voice from the inside. Its value and impact are more universal than we can imagine.” Continue reading
